You know what really grinds my gears: Kickball.
I recently talked to one of my good friends who said that he was in an actual kickball tournament two weekends from now. Not a charity or an I'm so bored that I have to resort to kickball event. An actual legitimate tournament. This really made me start thinking. Kickball is the most illegitimate sport ever imagined. Think of baseball and soccer conceiving a child in which a dodgeball was somewhere added to the mix. Therefore, it is an embarrassment to baseball (our national pastime), soccer (the rest of the world's pastime but not so much ours), and dodgeball (my favorite pastime and movie). Sure, it's great for kids to run around and fight obesity (especially coming from Alabama), but it doesn't teach them how to succeed in any other sport. You'll never need to know how to roll or kick a dodgeball. I'll look the other way until you're ten or twelve years old, but it's just plain embarrassing to see men in their twenty's and thirty's getting riled up over a kickball game. I'd rather watch a montage of Lifetime movies.
Since 1933.
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