The Comeback Kids...or Yanks

As I sit here, anxiously awaiting the decisive US/Algeria soccer match, I can't help but wonder why this World Cup has been so bewildering. France's meltdown, the mediocrity of elites such as Spain, and the rise of Slovenia are just a few examples. It seems that signs of the apocalypse are breeding upon the soccer grounds of South Africa. Nevertheless, through this confusion, one team has been consistent through the opening weeks. The US soccer team has been inconsistently consistent in two areas. The first, although I'm not terribly proud of it, is that we are unstoppable when it comes to playing horribly within the first fifteen minutes or so. The second and more gratifying fact is that we may be the grittiest, most proud, and most relentless group in the chase. Sure, the second fact may be amplified by the first, but America loves some drama. Our team surely provides.

Examples...

180 seconds into our World Cup start, things were looking dismal. England had already 'proven' their assumptions that Group C was theirs for the taking as they went up 1-0. We weren't having any of that. The US went on a stunning attack as they pounded and pounded away until Clint Dempsey got off a shot in the 39th that miraculously bounced off of the goalkeeper and spun in. However skimpy the shot, the score was tied. The US continued their offensive and had a couple of other chances to score including a spectacular opportunity for Jozy Altidore.

We went on, proud to have tied England, to play the underdog Slovenia. Again, we allowed a goal right out of the gate. Twelve minutes in definitely abides to our fifteen and under standard. No worries. It's Slovenia. They soon hung up another goal right before the half. Now worry. Down 2-0 is a huge task for any team, especially one of the lesser elite. Our resiliency soon kicked in. Three minutes into the next half, Landon Donavan was one on one side left of goal with the goalkeeper. A tough shot, he upper-decked a beautiful shot to put us within one. With newfound confidence, we started an assault that I do not believe any team could have stopped. Finally, Michael Bradley scored a clutch equalizer in the 82nd to send the game into a draw in which it ended.

-For purposes of length, I won't get into possibly the worst call in soccer history which would've put us in a great position to advance today. Bradley was being bear-hugged from behind, he couldn't have fouled if he wanted.

Thank you, USA, for being consistent and not having a complete and utter meltdown like France and for not giving up a million goals like North Korea and for not having a nickname like socceroos or anything like that.

PS. Please refrain from your fifteen and under testament. It really doesn't appeal to most of us.

The (Not So) U.S. Open

This year's US Open did not belong to the United States. It shouldn't have belonged to any of the 83 considering the performances on Sunday. Our championship shifted from a challenge of who could play the best to who could play the least badly.

Take for example, the scores entering the final day.
Johnson -6
McDowell -3
Woods -1
Havret E
Els E
Mickelson +1

Most expected Dustin Johnson to play well, as he had all weekend and every time he has played at Pebble Beach, and hold off the rest of the field. It became evident that would not be likely after the first few holes. This opened up chances for the rest of the field, but most failed to take advantage. One by one, the rest of the field began to fizzle and fade as players could not handle the winds, terrain, and renovated course.

Now, the scores following the final round:
Mcdowell E
Havret +1
Els +2
Mickelson +3
Woods +3
Kuchar +4

So, for the US Open, it was not a strong showing by the US. The top three (McDowell, Havret, and Els) were from Ireland, France, and South Africa. The top US contenders played less than par in a non-golf sense. Johnson limped in at +11. Mickelson and Woods did their best to not win by shooting +2 and +4 respectively. McDowell gave Havret plenty of chances to take the lead, but Havret threw them away each time.

Well, I guess I should congratulate Mcdowell (the first Irishman to win a US Open), but I think I'll congratulate him for surviving a disaster of a final round by all.

ArTESTAMENT to the Lakers

I think that everyone can agree that Ron Artest is quite possibly the most bipolar player in the NBA. Metaphorically speaking, think of Harvey Dent's face post being halfway engulfed in fire. When Ron is on his game, it's spectacular. I would venture to say magical to a degree. When he is not, I wonder how he starts or even made it into the NBA for that matter. The Lakers needed him come game seven of a spectacular (even though I had earlier posted about not wanting to watch it) series. Thankfully for his most-of-the-time critical coach, Jackson, he was unbelievable. Artest racked up twenty points (one of those being a rare three) and played his signature style defense obtaining five steals while basically shutting down Paul Pierce. From start to finish, I, and most of the nation, would call him the MVP of game 7.

The best part about him though is how literally out there he can be. Forget the Laker yellow hair and the Chinese symbols inside, the laughable PETA adds (nothing against PETA, just cheesy),and the crowd incident years ago. Just take a look at who he thanked in his post game interview. Big thanks to Sarah Hughes for posting this on my wall.

Quoted from Yahoo Sports:

"In case you lost track, here's a quick chronological rundown of all the people thanked by Ron Artest in less than a minute:

• Everybody in his hood.
• The World Wide Warriors, I guess?
• His wife.
•His family.
• His kids.
• Everybody.
• His doctor, Dr. Sandy (?).
• His psychiatrist, who really helped him relax a lot and apparently told Ron he would make a 3-pointer. This may be "Dr. Sandy," but that is unclear.
• ESPN sideline reporter Doris Burke."

And managed to get in some promo for his single, apparently named 'Champion.' My advice: stay as far away as humanly possible. I'm guessing it will probably be worst than Eddie Murphy's bomb of a movie 'The Adventures of Pluto Nash.' Most of you probably don't even know what I'm talking about right now.

I'm just glad he hit the three. I would have hate to see him if he didn't.

The Big Ten (I Mean Twelve), The Big Twelve (I Mean Ten), and the Pac-12?

Should've listened when they said don't mess with Texas. (Unless you're Alabama)

I want to give a big shout out this week to the Texas Longhorns for sticking it to the 'man' (Newly selected Pac-10 commissioner Larry Scott). Thank you for standing up and addressing that you had no interest in any 'superconferences' or Justice Leagues that were in need of members. Finally, thank you for being the nucleus that saved the Big 12, for now.

Moving on, the widespread panic of total geographic obliteration and conference annihilation seemed inevitable. Everyone imagined a sixteen team conference that would probably dissemble within ten years. Turns out that doomsday dropped a grenade instead of a nuke. Only four teams left their respected conferences when it was all said and done. The Pac-10 will probably end up with twelve teams as I believe that Utah will join, and the Big Twelve will turn into a mixture of ten teams. This is still chaotic in a sense. Things won't be normal, but it's better than jumping right into the abyss. I fear that we are nearing a time where there will be four superconferences. At least, we may be able to analyze and understand that day in the next few years instead of making a superbly rash decision.

A-Teed off Dana White

I pity the fool who tries to defeat Dana White.

Dana White, UFC President (and indeed a male even though the first name Dana), has been irate over one of his UFC superstars, Quinton 'Rampage' Jackson. Rampage is one of the most popular UFC fighters over the past years, but why would the UFC President be upset about one of his 'superstars'? First off, Dana White can find anger even through listening to a child's laughter. Second off, he was conned into believing that Rampage would not be playing B.A. Baracus (or Mr. T) in the upcoming A-Team movie. Not so fast my friend. Rampage has Hollywood visions of his own, and the sport that he represents can take a backseat. The backseat representing one of the biggest fights of this year, UFC 114 vs. Rashad Evans. White could've snapped Rampage in two at the press conference. Anyways, the results-Rashad had his way with Rampage even though the final score was 30-27. The movie-we're not entirely sure yet.

Was it right for Rampage to follow his Hollywood visions and take his sight off of UFC?

Well, I'm laughing, not pitying, the fool Rampage. One of the biggest trash-talking guys of the octagon (even before this match), he deserved the lost. He disappointed not only himself but his many fans who wait months in between his fights. He disgraced the sport as well as President White. Of course, one can't make any UFC fighter fight, but it's common etiquette to put your attention to the sport you represent. Sure, advertisements are a different story but a full length film? Are you kidding me? As things are looking more and more dismal for Rampage's career in the octagon, maybe Mr. T can jumpstart his acting career.

Which World Cup Team Are You?

First, Congratulations to the Alabama baseball team who will advance after beating Georgia Tech 10-8. Roll Tide.

Second, Thanks to Sports Illustrated...who I stole this from.

Third, Enjoy...

1.Could You Bring Yourself to cheer for the Yankees?

Yes-Brazil No-Keep Going

2.Or the Patriots?

Yes-Germany No-Keep Going

3.Perhaps you're more of a Cinderella person?

Yes-Paraguay, Chile, Uruguay, Switzerland No-Keep Going

4....Or maybe you don't take sides?

Yes-Switzerland No-Keep Going

5.Is it important that your team score?

Yes-Keep Going No-Serbia, Greece

6...In bunches?

Yes-Spain No-Keep Going

7. Are you okay with your net being ravaged?

Yes-Japan No-Keep Going

8.Are you generally "just happy to be here?"

Yes-South Korea, Denmark, Honduras, Algeria, New Zealand No-Keep Going

9.Do you deal well with heartbreak?

Yes-Nigeria, Netherlands, Ivory Coast No-Keep Going

10.Are you just trying to be contrarion?

Yes-Mexico No-Keep Going

11.Are you really in it for the WAGs (picture of hottie)?

Yes-England No-Keep Going

12.Are you good with your hands?

Yes-France No-Keep Going

13.Do you fall down often for no reason at all?

Yes-Portugal, Italy No-Keep Going

14.Cheater, drug addict, egomaniac: Do you consider these to be desirable leadership qualities?

Yes-Argentina No-Keep Going

15.Word Test: Bafana Bafana! Did you just giggle?

Yes-Keep Going No-South Africa

16.How about socceroos-does that sound funny?

Yes-Keep Going No-Australia

17.Can you say Indomitable Lions 10 times fast?

Yes-Cameroon No-Keep Going

18.Can you pull off this look at the pub? (brightly colored striped soccer shirt)

Yes-Ghana No-Keep Going

19.Have you ever wanted to be in a beauty pageant?

Yes-United States No-Keep Going

20.Do you aspire to rule the world?

Yes-North Korea No-Keep Going

21.Are you Charlie Brown?

Yes-Slovenia No-Keep Going

WAIT-----YOU ARE SLOVAKIAN!!!!!!!!

The Tiger Woods Effect

It seems as though more and more athletes these days are falling off of the 'respectable' ladder. Most notably, there is Tiger Woods, but there are a variety of other athletes (Plaxico Burress, Ben Roethlisberger, Gilbert Arenas, Allen Iverson etc. etc.) who are no longer moral citizens in the eyes of the public. Whether it be with sex, drugs, alcohol, or firearms, these athletes have made very poor lifestyle choices. The one thing that I can't understand is when someone says "I can't pull for Tiger Woods anymore since he cheated on his wife" or "Tiger Woods is not one of the greatest golfers of all time anymore."

I call this The Tiger Woods Effect. Rigdon definition: the belief that an athlete's personal image should mar or strengthen that same athlete's sports image. I don't care that Tiger Woods cheated on his wife. He's STILL the best golfer in the world. He's STILL the savior for golf ratings. Ben Roethlisberger is STILL one of the best quarterbacks in the nation. Allen Iverson is STILL one of the best point guards of all time. Sure, the things that they have done are despicable, but what people need to realize these days is that there needs to be a separation between being a ROLE MODEL and a SPORTS MODEL.

I think the valuable aspect of sports is that, unlike other 'face-time' professions like politics, acting, and broadcasting, when a player hits the field, one can forget all of his/her personal problems and truly marvel at the greatness of a player. So, when Tiger Woods tees off again, do not think of the actions he has committed off the field. Think that you have the opportunity to watch one of the greatest golfers of all time play the game.

PS. Watching Old School right now in case you wanted to know.

Another Problem for Detroit

Armando Galarraga (20-18 for his career) needed one more out to join the likes of Dallas Braden and Roy Halladay to be the third pitcher since, take a seat, May 9th to throw a perfect game. He had mastered his pitches all day. His pitches constantly moved around the plate confusing batters and making them look foolish' especially his offspeed pitches. He was calm. He was determined. He was set on each out. He deserved this perfect game. Detroit, as a city, deserved this game, but it was taken from them.

It wasn't taken from him by a teammate's error or lack of hustle (just watch the centerfielder, Austin Jackson, run down the ball for the first out of the ninth). It wasn't taken from him by a bad pitch. It was taken by Robert Joyce. Joyce is neither a fielder or a hitter. He is merely the guy making calls behind first base. With two outs in the bottom of the ninth, Jason Donald fisted a slow grounder in between first and second. The first baseman, Miguel Cabrera, ran down the ball and-rather slowly-flipped it to Galarraga at first just in time or so it had appeared to everyone anxiously glued to their television sets, even Indian fans. He may have bobbled the ball, but it was completely obvious that he had the runner beat by a foot or two. Joyce flat out just missed the call. Not only had he had deprived this young pitcher of becoming a member of a very select club, but he also deprived this team of needed motivation and celebration.

Anyways, the true moral learned from this debacle is not whether instant replay should be used for similar plays in the future of if the call should be overturned. It was shown through Galarraga. He did not become irate or yell profanity and other obscenities at Joyce as other players around the league show on a daily basis toward other umps. He understood that Joyce did not puposely make that call. He talked to reporters in a tone that was understanding of the obvious pain that Joyce felt after seeing the replay. Galarraga handing Joyce the lineup card today is one of the most touching images baseball has had in a while. In a world of unsportsmanlike sports heroes, Galarraga is a Gyarados among Magikarp (excuse my Pokemon reference; it's all I could think of). I hope that we can all learn from his amazing attitude.

Expansion???????

You know what really grinds my gears? All of this expansion talk.

First off, when I watch my College Football Live during the offseason, I want to see interesting stories such as rising stars for next year and key games and matchups. I don't want to turn to ESPN every day and see some different 'expert' shed their light on the expansion situation facing the Big Ten, Big 12, and SEC (and possibly other conferences). The same topic shown every day from someone else's different and competing perspective only makes the topic more redundant.

Secondly, it makes no sense to me (does it to you? Thanks, Tim James) . The SEC and Big 12 are already dynamic and prosperous conferences, and there is much speculation that the SEC is so competitive now that the really good teams beat themselves out of contention (even though we've won the past four national championships). So what good would it be to add possibly four more teams to such a conference? I'm sorry that the Big Ten may be puny in comparison these days, and that Notre Dame is conference-less. I think at most the Big Ten should only add two to have a championship game, even though their champions don't show up come bowl season.

Finally, what will happen to the non-conference games? Will they become non-existant? I want to see how conferences stack up against each other. It's healthy to see if one conference is stronger than the other. I want to see the Saturday night lights over Bryant-Denny this fall when the Penn State Nittany Lions roll in. It's what makes college football season special, and I hope it doesn't change anytime soon.

Playoffs. That's a more interesting conversation.